Windows Phone 7 Sales Continue To Struggle 351
rtfa-troll writes "Even with the pre-Christmas buying rush, Microsoft is already desperately offering a new buy one get one free offer similar to the ones they gave for the KIN. According to the article, 'Windows Phone 7 devices can't even manage two per cent of the fortnight's sales.' These aren't official Microsoft figures; they come from online shopping sites. But since Microsoft official sales figures seem subject to manipulation, this is perhaps one of the better guesses we will get at the success of Windows Phone 7 until well into next year. This also strongly backs up other reports of deeply disappointing phone sales. Even Microsoft supporters have been wondering for a while whether it's time for Ballmer to go. If the sales reports are true, then he may be pushed before he jumps."
Re:Less editorialization please (Score:1, Funny)
Microsoft releases actual cow turd as phone (Score:4, Funny)
Desperate to stay competitive against iPhone and Android mobile devices, Microsoft has released a two-pound lump of actual cow faeces that they claim constitutes a phone.
Windows Mobile 7, in development for several years, strips the mobile telephone down to its fundamental essence: futility, annoyance, malfunction, inconvenience and a socially unacceptable odour. Confounding analyst expectations, the turd is in fact shined.
US mobile carriers hailed the turd as the perfect physical complement to their world-famous customer service. "This powerful product will promote our growth!" said John Harrobin of Verizon Wireless. "We're marketing them as edible."
"We think we can really work the brand equity," said Steve Ballmer, modelling the optional shoulder-length rubber gloves. "Everyone works with our stuff all day every day. They know who Microsoft is and what we do."
"How about making our customers actually swallow our bullshit physically?" said John Harrobin. "Windows Mobile 7 was my idea."
Picture: Steve Ballmer overjoyed at Windows phone sales figures [newstechnica.com].
Re:Less editorialization please (Score:4, Funny)
> BOGO offers are in no way a sign of desperation.
Exactly. It's why you often see BOGOF offers on PS3s, digital cameras etc. It's what you do when your product is a runaway success and you can't keep up with demand.
Re:Less editorialization please (Score:5, Funny)
Which is funny because if you look at the web stats of Slashdot, 90% of visitors are using Windows computers. LOL, bunch of poseur wannabes
Love the sinner, hate the sin.
Re:It's time to rebrand (Score:4, Funny)
Microsoft trying to be cool is like dad trying to dance.
Re:Less editorialization please (Score:3, Funny)
So you acknowledged that Linux is a religion :) ...
But for going to heaven you have to choose the right text editor too